my heart

With no reason to fret, no reason to be anxious, no reason to worry... however, my heart is still sad. I wonder if God hears me. I know that is a silly statement. Of course He is listening, I just don't think my heart is grasping His words... believing them as truth. Why should I ever doubt or fear my Father? I hear Him but am awaiting failure. Maybe I just fear another let down or another piece of me to break. I honestly don't know if there is much left to break. I feel like I'm down to my core. There is one tiny little ounce I'm afraid of letting go. I know it's necessary, but I fear it won't come back. I know I must surrender. I have no choice. I just wish things would happen a little faster than the slow pace they are at. Maybe the rate at which time appears to move is much different than reality. God's moving hearts - I can see it, I feel it. Why on earth am I doubting? God, I need this to pass. I need to trust completely... 99.9% will hardly do. So God... here's my written confession. Dated. I lay this down. This love deep inside. My most cherished thing next to You. It's Yours. I know You are holding it now. You are re-shaping it into what You can use. For Your glory. No more tears... for the time of mourning is over.

Your Hands

BY KATIE HERZIG, JJ AND DAVID HELLER

I have unanswered prayers
I have trouble I wish wasn’t there
And I have asked a thousand ways
That you would take my pain away
You would take my pain away

I am trying to understand
How to walk this weary land
Make straight the paths that crooked lie
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine

When my world is shaking, heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave your hands

When you walked upon the earth
You healed the broken, lost and hurt
I know you hate to see me cry
One day you will set all things right
Yeah, one day you will set all things right

When my world is shaking, heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave your hands

Your hands that shaped the world
Are holding me
They hold me still

PRAYER POWER

Matt. 6: 5,6

1. Importance of Prayer

1. Most important tool given to us by God
2. Devil will try to prevent your prayers
3. Our desire to be with God will increase
4. Key to releasing God’s power and blessings
5. Knowledge of Him will increase
6. We will become “one” with Him in prayer
7. Cannot truly succeed unless we pray
8. Prayer increases faith, faith increases prayer
   
   

2. How to Pray

1. Dialogue with God, not monologue
2. Commit every day to prayer
3. Listen for His voice, trained spiritual ears
4. Specific in prayers (Luke 11:11,12)
5. Pray without ceasing (1Thess. 5:17)
6. Expect answers! (1John 5:14,15)
7. Be bold (James 5:16b)

3. Getting Answers to Prayer

1. Find His will in each situation you pray about (John 5:30b; 6:38; 7:17)
2. Pray His Kingdom come, His will be done


1. Pray FOR what is allowed in heaven
2. Pray AGAINST what is not allowed in heaven


3. Hindrances


1. Sin (Prov. 28:9; John 9:31; Is. 59: 1,2; Lam. 3:40-44)
2. Lack of faith (Mark 11: 24,25; James 1:6-8; Heb. 11:6)
3. Selfishness (James 4:2-3)
4. Lack of compassion (heartless) (Prov. 21:13)
5. Domestic Problems (1Peter 3:7)
6. Pride and self-righteousness (Job 35:12-13; Luke 18:13-14)
7. Being out of His will (1John 3:22)
8. Disobedience (1John 3:22)
9. Unforgiveness (Mark 11:25-26)


4. Those who get answers:


1. Righteous
2. Abide in Him
3. Delight in Him
4. Trust in Him
5. Needy
6. Suffering
7. Oppressed
8. Widows and Fatherless
   
   

4. Types of Prayer

1. Personal Prayer (a.k.a. Quiet Time)
1. Follow example Jesus gave (The Lord’s Prayer)


2. Intercessory Prayer
1. Praying for others
2. Agreement is key
3. Pray Scripture – powerful!
4. Pray in the Spirit – also powerful!

5. Our Authority

1. Know our authority
2. NO FEAR!
3. Stand on the Word of God
4. Pray Scripture (follow Jesus’ example)
5. Use Jesus’ name (John 14: 13,14)
   

6. Fasting

1. Valuable
   
1. Brings humility
2. Spiritual wisdom and impartation
3. Brings a breakthrough
4. Overcomes selfishness in us (food-hold)
5. Intensifies prayer life
   
   
2. Methods of Fasting
   1. Partial (Daniel’s fast)
   2. Absolute (water only, no food)
   3. Supernatural (40 days)
   4. Corporate
   
   
3. Expected (not “if” but “when” you fast)

Rejoice... the time of mourning is over.

Philippians 4:4-9 (New International Version)

4Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

8Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 9Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

I only dreamt of you...

i see thy love in the distance
breathless gasping for air, for in thy dreams you where
awakening to the bleakness in my room
as my eyes begin to blear reality sets and starts the fear
for do dreams come true or do i die alone
waiting like the petals of a wilting flower fall off
until there is non and the once beautiful flowers dies naked
with no one to clothe it
will i hold you in the grave or will the grave hold me?
the numbing dreams never end the swallow's wings still amongst
the idle wind
my colored wold turns to gray scale
recollecting the memories eyes covered hazel
contradiction of thy thoughts standing calm love not lost
searching till i find my princess whose passionate eyes cut right through me
for what is life if love only exists in thy thoughts?
what is romance if it is all fiction?
nothing but a portrait left empty, a passing cloud of hurt
by to meet ym love in the flesh is to find my whole heart
your heart breaks though me your love is the key
longing for my hearts door
to what day till i see sun rays shine upon your face
i dream of you the way you look
the beating of love in your heart
your wolds are like the flowing of a spring, knowing thy love
waits for me until eternity's end
is this poetry or is this love's sickness
engulfing my every being
take the heart from you and the blood ceases from me
i see what you hear
breathe taking the closest thing to me and my savior
falling in love to a person i have never met
but knowing she has salvation's fragrance
by God's grace this love will be free and able to fly away above
the earth to a point of exhaustion
but your breath will keep me alive
words are pointless for this love is speechless
preparing fro the curtains close
laying their clutching hands so tight i can feel your heart
telling me it will be all right
ascension to heaven where this love can not only walk
but it runs through the endless fields of joy
where love neither ends nor begins but flows everlasting
this was thy dream this daybreak and will by thy prayer
that i will rest sleepless till the sun rises on that day
and butterflies sing with us as we write love symphony
the pages of life fill the story of our love in a time long ago
where fairy tales come true
and you and i my love will live happily ever after
i love you

You have me inside and out.

I'm sitting in joyful anticipation. There is a peace so overwhelming that tears slip periodically in honor and serve as a reminder of God's faithfulness, His love, His goodness to us... His children. How precious are His thoughts of us? How perfect are His plans and His ways? My feet are dancing even though I'm standing still. The celebration is of this path I'm on. No more mud, no more sinking... The seas are peaceful, the sun is shining on my face, the wind is at my back, I can see His face clearly in my heart. Our Father is so faithful... and so in love with us.

I haven't felt so free in so long.